Coping with Holiday Stress is Not Always Easy, and That’s Okay

BY DIANE NEAL, MS, LPCC, MENTAL HEALTH DIRECTOR

Many celebrations are just around the corner. Regardless of what or how you celebrate, or don’t, it is almost impossible to avoid engaging in some matter. The messaging, advertising, decorations, events, and focus are all around us. This time of year we are supposed to be joyous, grateful, happy, forgiving, and kind. We are encouraged to be with family and friends. But for many people, the holiday season is not always the most wonderful time of year.

The holiday season can be lonely, or stressful. It can be a reminder of those no longer with us, of seasons that brought pain, heartache, or abuse. It is a time that can be filled with anxiety, pressure, depression and sometimes even panic. For those already struggling with mental health issues, it is a time of heightened symptoms. But even for those with no mental health history, the holidays bring feelings forward for all of us; sensory recall of times lost, grief for those not with us, anxiety for expectations, financial stress, loneliness when there are no planned celebrations alone or with others, pressure to be and do all the things we are expected to be and do.

All of us have feelings associated with this time of year. All of us. And that’s ok.

If you feel yourself starting to struggle or be challenged by this time of year, from November through January, or see someone who is, consider these ideas:

• Check in on and reach out to the ones you love and friends you care about. Staying connected helps them and you.

• Get active and move your body; if you can. Get outside. The crisp fresh air can be stimulating and as the days get shorter it is important for us to seek the sun when it is out.

• Journal how you are feeling. • Take small steps to keep your mind, body, and spirt healthy. Holidays can be stressful for many people so give yourself space to having unexpected feelings and ask for help if it becomes overwhelming.

• Set a manageable budget and stick to it. It may require conversations about gift-giving with others so they understand you may not be able to participate at the level you have in the past.

• Decide if opting out of some activities will make your schedule and stress levels more manageable. Take time to recharge and don’t judge yourself about it. It is OK to say no.

• Wake up and make your bed. Start your day with an accomplishment. Acknowledge that however you are feeling is okay. Just because it’s the holiday season doesn’t mean you have to feel happy.

• Be kind to yourself. All you can do is your best and your best is good enough. It’s impossible to please everyone.